Of fannish letters and polyamory

(incredible, extreme spoilers for the entire 5th series of Doctor Who)

Dear Doctor Who fandom,

            Amelia “Amy” Jessica Pond is a strong, independent woman. She has a huge heart and a sharp mind. She is perfectly capable of loving whomever she likes. This includes her husband Rory and the Doctor.

            Yes, and the Doctor. The fact that she is married to Rory Williams does not and should not stop her from loving the Doctor just as much as Rory. It’s obvious that she gets very different things from the two men in her life.

            Rory loves her dearly, sweetly, passionately, and deeply. He has always been there for her, a steady line in her life despite her flights of fancy that the Doctor inadvertently caused. In an alternate timeline, he stayed with her for nearly 2,000 years, guarding and protecting her as he waited dutifully for yet another one of the Doctor’s harebrained Batman gambits to be pulled off. He is loyal and loving and will stop at nothing to see Amy safe and happy. She needs that stability in her life, because she is too chaotic a spirit (between completely legitimate abandonment issues and a natural thirst for something more) to manifest it for herself.

            At the same time, there’s this unstoppable force in her life known as the Doctor, her raggedy Doctor, who briefly visited her when she was a little girl and then didn’t come back for twelve years (through no real fault of his own; it was mere seconds for the Time Lord). He is extremely unstable, hyperactive and playful as a child on a sugar high and yet impossibly wise as his 900+ years would grant, unable to sit still for any kind of extended period and whining whenever he is made to endure time passing in a boring, linear fashion. The Doctor feeds Amy’s sense of adventure, imparts his knowledge to her in bits and bytes, shows her wonders of the universe and comes to her rescue (Rory by his side) when she’s gotten in a bit too deep (and vice-versa, on occasion). His desire to protect both of his companions is strong, and he needs them as much as they need him.

            From these two relationships, Amy gains love and stability as well as adventure, knowledge and wonders. She would be incredibly unhappy without either one of these men at her side, even if she has trouble verbalizing those feelings sometimes (which, admittedly, is the one and only downfall of the trio as it stands: Rory still feels inadequate next to the Doctor when it comes to Amy, as though the men are still in some sort of competition over her. You don’t need to feel that way, Rory, sweetheart. Amy loves you so much. So much.).

            Fandom, please, I implore you. Stop taking Steven Moffat’s bait when he shakes the love triangle provocations in front of us all. You all watched as Amy chose both of her lads in episode S5.07, Amy’s Choice. She needn’t be called names or hated for showing feelings for both Rory and the Doctor. Let her have her Poncho Boys in peace.

            Best wishes!

            -Ceej

This letter brought to you by Ceej Knowing Too Many Polyamorous People For This Treatment Of A Fictional Character To Be Okay. And really, just look at Rory and Amy’s wedding album. The Doctor’s in half the pictures. Just try to tell me they aren’t all married to one another. 

I promise I’ll have a more substantial and less dorkishly fannish post here about my thoughts on love, monogamy, polyamory, and emotional exclusivity at some point. I am still in the process of compiling them into something that other people might actually be able to understand, rather than the strewn-about-in-my-mind’s-filing-room mess that they currently are. In the meantime, take this as my “there are options if monogamy just isn’t working for you. Polyamory is a completely, 100% viable option. Just think critically about your life and the lives of those you love, communicate, and you’ll be fine.” post.

xx~Ceej

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